Cochran Family History and News – BlogCochran.com

I moved out for the first time about two weeks after I graduated from High school.  I packed my bags and flew to Utah for school, leaving behind almost everyone I knew.  I decided to write about some of my first year of college because it just blended right into my story about moving out.

My last Sunday at church was the day of my little brother Bryan’s baptism.  My siblings and I all sang the primary song “When I am Baptized” and by the end of it we were all crying.  It was also the day of Barbara’s mission farewell.  I remember my mother spoke in church and told stories about how Barb had prepared for her mission.  Many of the stories were comical stories from her childhood.   She told about when Barb was really  little and there was nothing in the fridge except frosting and carrots so Barb dipped the carrots in the frosting and ate them (showing resourcefulness, I think).  I also remember that when she talked about me going off to college, she started to cry.

My whole family came to the airport to see us off and most of us cried.  Back then you could go right up to the gate and wait until the person boarded the plane.

I arrived at my apartment late at night in Provo, Utah.  I remember feeling a thrill of excitement as I lugged my suitcases up two flights of stairs to my apartment on the third floor.  I was excited to be on my own for the first time and to be going to BYU.  I lived in apartment #3 at Nelson Apartments (at the corner of 200 East and 300 North in Provo).  We used to call it Nel-SLUM.  We had the nicest apartment in the complex because a few years back there had been a fire in the apartment and when they fixed it up, they put in nicer kitchen cabinets and paint.  The building had a tiny laundry room with maybe two coin operated washing machines and dryers.

My sister was leaving for her mission in a few months and she had arranged for me to move in with her and her roommates.  I remember my roommates at Nelson were Sandy, Joyce , and Annette.  I think Annette and Joyce moved in when Barb left for her mission.  I remember that Sandy had a car, but I don’t think the rest of us did.  I walked almost everywhere I went.  I walked to school and to the grocery store.  Smith’s was the closest grocery store and I mostly didn’t mind the walk, but it always seemed the longest when I bought milk.  I remember my hands would hurt by the time I got home with my gallon of milk in one hand and the rest of my grocery bags in the other.

I got a job at BYU catering just before school started.  It was the only job I applied for and I had applied for it because I had a job working for Heidelberg cafeteria while in high school and  I had worked as a caterer a time or two through that job.

Barbara had registered me for all my classes.  At that time registration was done by touch tone phone.  She looked up what she thought was my major and picked out a good selection of freshman classes.  She did a good job except that she signed me up for the elementary ed science class which meant I had to take two semesters of a physical science to complete the requirement instead of one.

My ward included our little apartment complex and a few blocks with houses.  Nelson Apartments was made up of two buildings, one men’s and one women’s.  The bottom floor apartments housed married couples and small families.  It wasn’t the ideal place for my first year.  Most of the students living this far off of campus where older.  I remember the guys that we spent the most time with were all 27 (I was 18).  Add to that the fact that my sister had lived in that ward for a little while and I immediately had my identity as Barb’s little sister and I felt like most people in the ward thought of me as a child and I felt like my dating opportunities in the ward were limited.

I remember being a little lonely at first.  My first week there I met a boy with curly brown hair.  I can’t remember his name.  I think we had the door open with a fan in it and I was doing dishes in the kitchen (funny how I can remember those details).  He stopped in and asked my name.  I think he stayed and talked for awhile.  I saw him several times over the next few days.  I think my sister Barbara was upset one day when she came home and he had his arm around me as we were watching a movie at our apartment.  That night she lectured me about men and about how I needed to be careful.  I remember her citing a high divorce rate among young naive BYU students.  That lecture established her in my mind as more of an authority figure than a friend and after that I felt like I couldn’t really talk to her about things.  It wasn’t long after that before I decided on my own that I wasn’t really interested in spending any more time with that boy.  

I made friends with our next door neighbor, Kim.  We’d sit outside and talk at night.  She was one of our family home evening group leaders. I think she went on her mission after Summer semester.

I went to freshmen orientation soon after moving out there and met a red-headed boy named Sam.  He called me up and asked me if I wanted to go out to Zuka Juice with him.  I accepted and told my roommates we were going to Bazooka Joes (I obviously hadn’t heard him right).  We started spending more and more time together.  I was dating him in August when my family came out to see Barbara off on her mission.  He was from Virginia.  I remember one time he invited me over to his apartment after class for dinner.  He had made lasagna.  When I told a friend about it she said he must be really serious about me if he made lasagna because of all the work that went into making it.  I remember going on walks with him on the little pathways around BYU campus.  One time he told me that he thought I was so beautiful that he didn’t know why I wasn’t married yet.  I laughed and told him I was a freshman, I’d only been away from home for a few months.  I think he was starting to get really serious and I still hadn’t decided if I really liked him.  I must have gone to some family event with him because I remember being alone in a suburban with his older sister and she told me that I needed to tell him how I felt about him  (at that point I didn’t really know how I felt about him).  I ended the relationship by telling him that I didn’t think I was ready for marriage yet.  In my mind that was a lie because I did want to get married and I wasn’t opposed to getting married as a freshman, I had just decided that I didn’t want to marry him and I didn’t want to hurt his feelings.

I went with my home teacher to Brigham City for Thanksgiving that year and was excited to be able to go home for Christmas.  When I walked in the door, Bryan was watching a Home Alone movie.  He came over to me and felt my face as if not sure it was really me, then he gave me a big hug.

I think I ended up a little off topic.  That was most of the first part of Freshman Year.

Zach will have to follow up and write his take on names, it might be slightly different.  Also, somehow I got carried away and this post is much longer than I had planned, but in the interest of family history I will leave it as is.

Our first boy was going to be David Hyrum Cochran.  I still like that name, but after I got pregnant, Zach had changed his mind about the name and we had to start all over with ideas.  We used to discuss names in the car and I specifically remember that we were driving down I-15 when one of us came up with the idea to name our son Isaac.  I think it was my idea, but I think that Zach thinks it was his idea.  We thought the meaning was perfect since it seemed like we were finally getting the promised blessing of having a child after a long wait, just like Abraham and Sarah in the Bible.  The name means “he laughs” in reference to the joy that Abraham and Sarah felt when they found out they were pregnant.  Later when I read the scripture again, it seems like they were laughing because of how old Sarah was when she was pregnant, but for me it will always be about the joy.  We thought we’d call him Ike, but we never have.

In all of our names we discussed, there were several people we wanted to honor in our son’s name.  We considered using a grandfather’s name.  We also considered adding a name to honor President Hinckley, but at first we ruled out both Gordon and Hinckley.  Obviously we changed our minds and gave him the middle name Hinckley.  President Hinckley was the prophet during most of the important things that happened in our lives at that point and we felt impressed and inspired by him.

Charlotte’s name came from Zach.  I was initially opposed to the name because of a strong connection I had with that name and the story of Charlotte’s web.  We continued to discuss the name and the association softened enough that I started to really like the  name.  I liked that it was unique and still recognizable.

I think I came up with the middle name.  I remember thinking about family names and wanting to honor Charlotte’s grandmother by giving her the same middle name.  At that point I didn’t realize that Rose was also Charlotte’s great-grandmother’s first name.

Nicole’s name also came from Zach.  Zach left work early to go to her ultrasound and he said that as he got into the car he thought to himself, “it’s going to be a girl and we’re going to name her Nicole.”  I was initially opposed to the name because I thought it was too common.  I loved how unique and familiar Charlotte’s name was and wanted something along the same lines as that, but eventually (while I was in labor and couldn’t think of a name I liked better that he’d accept) Zach convinced me that Nicole was not a common name for her generation.  I wasn’t initially thrilled with the choice, but the day Zach blessed her I changed my mind.  I remember him saying in the blessing how her name was in remembrance of Christ’s victory over death (Nicole is a french form of Victoria which means victory) and that brought tears to my eyes.

We chose her middle name Kate because it sounded good with Nicole and we wanted  something more interesting than the common middle names like Marie and Lynn (no offence to Heidi or anyone who named her).

I assume everyone knows by now who we named our Ila after.  I always liked her name, maybe it was partly because I loved my grandmother so much.  I felt close to her and yearned for more time with her throughout my life.  I actually tried to get Zach to agree to putting the name Ila in Nicole’s name, but we couldn’t come up with a first name that worked with Ila as a middle name and we weren’t fully convinced that we should use it as a first name.  We really struggled with finding a name for Ila.  Zach liked the name Mellissa, but I couldn’t be excited about that name.  We toyed around with several names and didn’t have a strong idea about what we  wanted to name her.  Jane was a name that I liked and was possibly at the top of my list for first names. 

Out here you have to set up an appointment with the hospital and register before going into labor.  The first step is to set up all of the billing information.  As I was giving my information to the lady she asked me about names and if we’d chosen a name yet.  I told her that we hadn’t and she continued to ask what names we had been thinking about.  I told her the list of names that we had discussed and somewhere in that discussion, I said that I had wanted to use the name Ila, but I couldn’t figure out a name to go with it.  Jane was also one of the names in that group and the lady suggested the name Ila Jane to me.  I instantly loved it and even told her so.  I wondered if Zach would agree to it, I was almost too  afraid to ask because I was so excited about the name.  I honestly could not wait to tell him the idea, but was very nervous that he’d reject it at the same time.  That night I presented the name to him.  I told him that me and the lady at registration had decided on a name for our baby and that I wanted him to think about the name while I showered and then I’d come back and he could tell me what he thought.  When I came back into our “wood room” after our shower, he instantly agreed to the name without further discussion.  I was so excited, but also afraid that he’d change his mind at the same time.  We agreed not to tell anyone about it before she was born.

Someone asked me what we were naming her just after she was born and as I said the name Ila, I instantly felt like maybe it wasn’t the right name, but after telling a few more people it started to sound right again and by the time I left the hospital I was feeling good about the name.  When my mom came she told me that we were at the hospital that they had taken my grandmother to after her stroke and that my grandmother’s room was even on the same floor.

As time has gone by, Ila’s name has increased in significance to me and I find myself more and more pleased with our choice.  I know that my kids will all know about my grandma and that as she grows,  Ila will want to know about the woman that she was named after.  The name is unique enough that she’ll probably be asked where it came from throughout her life.  I love that by using her name, my grandma will be remembered for generations more in a very personal way by Ila and by Ila’s children and maybe even by Ila’s grandchildren!

An unexpected consequence of naming her after my beloved grandmother is that I become emotional about hearing her name said in frustration and I have this increased desire for everyone to love her.   There is a connection to her name in that desire that I can’t entirely explain because I know she’s a different person, but it almost feels like when people love Ila, they also love my grandmother.

For as long as I can remember, all I wanted to be when I grew up was a mom.  I know, cheesy answer, but it’s true.  I spent a lot of time taking care of my little brother Bryan when I was young and I developed a special bond with him.  I was 11 when we had our big car accident and I remember going with him to all his different therapy sessions.  I thought he was such a cute fun little boy and I decided that if I had to work, I’d want a job working with kids like him.  I remember ruling out being a respitory therapist when I learned that patients could die on you and didn’t think I could handle that. 

Bryan entered “county preschool” at some point and took classes all though the summer.  I remember volunteering several times and spending the whole day there.  It was fun playing with those cute kids and I decided that if I couldn’t be a mom, I’d want to work in a place like that.  When I sent in my application to BYU, they had just closed the special education department so I had to choose something else.  My mom convinced me that Speech-Language Pathology was as close as I could get to special ed, so that’s what I took and you know the rest of the story.

The first class that comes to mind was AP English my senior year.  We had Mrs. Baker and we met after lunch.  It was a small class and the desks were lined up in a semi-circle.  We had a lot of reading for that class.  I remember that we got assignments at the end of our Junior year and had to read several books and turn in assignments over the summer.  One of the books we read was “Lord of the Flies.”  We also had to write in our journals everyday for that class.  She didn’t care what we wrote about, but we had to have written a certain amount of pages.  I remember sitting in front of my notebook and writing whatever came into my mind and flittering from one subject to the next.  I wonder if I could find the journal I wrote for that class.  I’d probably be too embarrassed to share my writings, but it’d be interesting for me to read.  But those weren’t the reasons I liked the class.  I actually hated reading assignments in school because I’m a painfully slow reader and when I try to read at length, my eyes start to water and I fight falling asleep. 

For each session of class we had a reading assignment.  She’d hand out articles and we’d have to highlight and write comments on the side to show that we had read the assignments.  We’d often spend the whole class period sitting around talking about what we had read.  That was the part I enjoyed.  My best friend Katie was in the class as well as a number of the smart “popular” girls who I had envied at different points in my high school years, yet there in that class we were all friends and the social class barriers which tormented me through some of my school years were gone.  

I liked language classes.  I took Latin in Jr. High and French in High School.  Languages were a fun break from the traditional coursework we were required to take.

I liked Choir, but mostly because it sometimes allowed me to socialize with my friends.  We had one day a week that the choir director just worked with the men and some of my friends and I snuck out of class and went to the bake shop for pastries.  We did that a few times and never got caught.  It was probably the “most naughty” think I did in High School.  I was generally a model student, too afraid to get in trouble.

So I wasn’t there for the first version, but I can say a few things about what I’ve seen in the last few years. 

She has shown her creativity and ingenuity in the way she takes simple everyday things and makes them into toys for her grandchildren.   It was surprising to see how much my children loved her toys and preferred them over the fancy store bought options.  Here are some of the things she has made for my kids to play with:

• a collection of lids and a container with a slotted lid to put them in
• empty spools of thread and a container to put them in
• homemade matching game with colors
• flannel board with pages of activities (Christmas tree decorating, making a clock, tree with fall leaves, vase of flowers, ect)
• homemade shape matching game
• picture book using images/clippings from a variety of places
• pictures of temples taken from a calendar and displayed at children’s height
• baby sized burp cloth for Charlotte to use with her doll
• magnetic matching book

There are probably more that could be added to this list.  I welcome comments, I will revise my post to reflect remembered ideas for the purpose of presenting a more accurate retelling

Here are the tidbits that I was able to get from Isaac.  I had to keep prodding him to tell me things.

I like the school in Orem and the school in Tennessee.  I like the best, Emma and Storm,  that’s my very best friends.  They go to school with me in Tennessee. 

I remember that at my school, last week had T-cup test week and that means that all the first graders had a T-cup test and they were testing all day, even when they’re eating.  We just go-ed into their rooms before the test and we gived him some things to be nice.  For four days it was on.  That’s a lot of days.  And the first graders might got tired at the end.

We’re going to the Zoo soon.  In Orem, we went to Pumpkinland.  I bought a pumpkin and went through the corn field maze.  [to me] You came and took a little group. [Which fieldtrip do you think would be more fun?]  I think the zoo will be less fun because there won’t be as much things to do.  It will just be full of animals.  I think he will teach us of animals.

Samuel and Bryson don’t listen to the best things to learn like counting one to a hundred, and counting by twos and by fives.  Bryson is the most lying.  He lies the most.  And Bryson is even naughtier than Samuel and now Samuel is even naughtier.  All the time Samuel doesn’t get treasure box, but just one time Bryson got treasure box so now Samuel turned into the naughtiest kid.

One day I learned about the naughty King.  He just did this thing.  He led them to church.  Like each person one at a time.  We had to do a war to get him out. {I remember him giving me a much better description than this, but his knowledge has soured a little with time}

I learned about how long insects can get to.  I just learned that they can get to as short as my hand to as short as two of my hands.

Ok, my pictures arrived before the next topic assignment.  For some reason, I thought that would be a nice way to add to the blog, I must have forgotten how dorky I looked.  I actually considered not posting them, but then who am I trying to impress anyway?  So here they are in all their glory!

At some point I made friends with a girl named Angie Kimmet who rode my bus. I can’t  remember when we became friends. I think she had only one younger sibling (a brother?)and her parents smoked and may have yelled a lot. Angie and I played Barbies most of the time. We both had a crush on a new boy in school one year (probably 3rd or 4th grade) and we would pretend that Ken was Chris (the new boy). Chris was probably my first crush ever. He had spiked hair and wore Miami Dolphins sweat pants just about everyday. I remember that his sweat pants would always be pulled up a little on one side so that the elastic caught just above his calf muscle. I don’t know why that was cool, but he was the epitome of cool and that’s what he wore.

Angie really liked this movie about a cartoonish looking duck from outerspace that somehow came to be in a city. She also introduced me to my first rated R movie (Coming to America). When I found out it was rated R later I felt very bad about watching it. She seemed to like the part of the movie best that I thought was the worst. As we got a little older she started inventing dirty scenarios with her Barbies. I remember once my mom overheard what she was saying while we were playing I got a ‘birds and the bees’ type lecture.

Before long a girl named Brenda moved in. Brenda had very fuzzy hair and may have been in resource classes. Brenda and Angie became friends and I was sorta Brenda’s  friend by default, although I don’t think I ever really liked her much. Okey also moved in and became friends with us. Brenda and Angie started telling dirty stories on the playground and they made me really uncomfortable so I decided that next time they started to tell a story I would just walk away. I think Okey must have come with me. Walking away from my first dirty story pretty much ended my friendship with Angie and Brenda. I think I remember them asking me why I was leaving and when I explained to them that I was uncomfortable with the stories that they were telling they got mad at me. I even think that they threatened to spread rumors about me if I walked away. After that Brenda became especially nasty and mean to me. She actually did make up a rumor to spread. She ran around the playground yelling that I liked to put ‘dirty pads’ on my head. Luckily, that was the best she could do. I actually remember being relieved that her rumor was so dumb. Her story got no mileage and I just ignored her and eventually things just calmed down, we just weren’t friends anymore.

I finished out Elementary school with Okey as my best friend. Okey came from a poor family with several little sisters, I think she was the oldest. Her whole family had 70s style hair cuts with lots of layers. They rented a rundown old house on State Route 18.  I think they were renting the house.  I remember it was decorated with things that had animal prints on them and that they used a kerosene heater placed in the  middle of the room.  Okey rode my bus, but got on at the end of the route. I remember the kids on the bus were cruel, they used to sing “Okey, from Okinawa” when she got on the bus. Besides being a little dorky, she was a good friend. She shared an attic room with her two sisters and was ‘New Kids on The Block’ fan. I think I remember that she had lots of buttons on her jean jacket and at least a few were of the "New Kids on The Block.’

I have a blog post ready to go, but I asked my mom to send some pictures in the mail to go with it and I am waiting for them to come.  I might be a little late than our week for this one.

In the meantime, I’ve written about my elementary school experience in some length on Virtute.org.  In the first one I wrote about riding the bus and my first few years of school and the second one I wrote about the last few years of elementary school.  I dug up a post that I wrote, but never posted on the subject of elementary school friends.